Adoptions and Cultural Issues

When you’re an adopted child of a different race or culture than your parents, it can be challenging for a young person. It’s vital for parents of biracial/bicultural adoptees to acknowledge that their child is indeed different in some ways.

For example, children adopted from Asia—which accounts for half of all U.S. adoptions—may be viewed by some as Asian, not Asian-American. Help your child feel a sense of pride about his or her culture and race so it becomes a positive part of his or her identity, along with the other positives of growing up as part of your family.

The color-blind, culture-blind view that love alone can conquer all isn’t realistic, experts say. It’s important to recognize cultural differences, and to engender pride in a child’s dual heritage. If you’re in a rural area with limited diversity, for instance, you may need to be creative about facilitating connection with your child’s heritage. Here are some ideas:

• Start early. Between ages 3 to 5 is an ideal time to talk about culture in ways that fit your child’s age. A growing list of special storybooks can help. The goal is to help your child learn about his or her heritage.
• In many areas it’s possible to find playgroups of children with similar heritage.
• Interactions with other parents who have adopted children from the same part of the world can be helpful to both parents and children.
• It helps children in cross-cultural adoptions to see up close how parents of their culture raise their children and interact as a family.
• Balance differences with similarities. Shared likes of music, sports, or personality traits aid bonding and help counter any “singling out” of your child.
• Tap into universities. Programs offer calligraphy, martial arts, ethnic dance or music, and language classes. Taking a Chinese language class with your Chinese child, for instance, is invaluable for sharing your child’s heritage.
• Consider a family heritage trip. It can be a life-changing eye-opener for all family members.